And He saw it was good...

I found two tiny tiny baby birds in the back yard last night, dead.  I was so full of sadness.  Something must have gotten to the eggs, as one was still in a tiny little ball.  I went inside to get a paper towel and my heart just flooded with how these tiny creatures were "safe" inside their egg, growing, living, getting ready to sing a song God placed deep in their knowing... and an enemy came and took it all away... and they were helpless.  And I was heartbroken.  I was sad for the mommy bird who returned to her nest to find it empty.

"And God said, "Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind."  And it was so.  God made the wild animals, each according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds.  And God saw it was good."  Genesis 1:24,25~

Life.  Beautiful life that God created... they give glory to Him by their very presence.  Oh how I long for eternity where harmony will lie over animals like the warm soft blanket of God's love.

"The wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling together; and a little child will lead them."  Isaiah 11:6~

Lord, I praise you and thank you for the animals you have created.  I thank you for the tenderness, strength, emotion, and love they possess and share.  I marvel at the endless variety you have given us.  I marvel at the joy they bring my soul.  I see you all over them... all in them... and all around them.  I am so thankful for the deep appreciation for them you have planted deep inside me, for I know it is a reflection of your heart... a piece of you.  I mourn at the ways man can disrespect, hurt, abuse, and destroy them.  Dominion or not... you never intended such horrible misuse of your creation.  And I know you do not overlook it.  Justice is yours.  But my heart still mourns. 

I can't wait to be the zoo keeper of heaven... the zoo with no cages and no walls... just precious animals and peace! 

"Praise the LORD from the earth, you great sea creatures and all ocean depths, lightning and hail, snow and clouds, stormy winds that do His bidding, you mountains and all hills, fruit trees and all cedars, wild animals and all cattle, small creatures and flying birds... Let them praise the name of the LORD, for His name alone is exalted; His splendor is above the earth and heavens."  Psalm 148:7-10 and 13 ~

P.S.  Thank you for my Dusty Poof... I love the way you love me through him!

Fun, Fun, and more Fun...

I seriously need to reveal the back yard soon... and I will.  But since no one has left me a comment in eons, I guess no one is reading anymore and so there is no rush on the reveal! :0)

In the meantime, here is my dream project for the backyard now...

I would never leave... it would be like having vacation in your backyard.  I'd have a daybed in there along with a wooden dinning table and chairs and some lovely wicker furniture.  And then I would never leave!

I can't believe summer is just moments away.  Where has the year gone!?  I am excited to do some really fun things with the kids this summer.  Here is one fun little activity and treat...

as well as making these with a large hole punch and paint chips...

in pinks, fresh greens and orange and yellows of course!

I can't wait!  Got to go move the sprinkler...

Yesterday and Today

Yesterday I taught Sunday school at church.  The lesson was on how God is Great.  The second part of the lesson was on how we praise God.  My 3rd - 5th graders listened.  I love it when I see them listening with their eyes!  And I taught them about the book of Psalms... read them several... and then had them write their own Psalm.  I was so touched as they took the time and wrote BEAUTIFUL psalms to the Lord.  It was one of the sweetest classes ever... just second to the class I taught on fruits of the Spirit!

Yesterday we made pleas for children who need love, who need to know God is great, and need to be taught how to see Him and how to praise Him.  They need help.  They need hope.  They need love.  They need families.  And the response to our pleas were nothing short of beautiful.  Today is the last day to commit to the hosting this summer of these kids... and God was moving mightily and I can't wait to see what happens today!

Today I got to go back to bed and sleep.  I got to sleep until 9 a.m.  I needed that sleep.  My husband is so sweet to let me sleep.  And today we have an appointment somewhere that may bring hope with it as well. :0) 

Today I am in love with God who shows Himself to me over and over and over.  I am in love with my friends who have hearts so big and full that I am the luckiest and most blessed girl to be friends with them. 

"We wait in hope for the LORD; He is our help and our shield.  In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name.  May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you."  Psalm 33:20-22~

"Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him and He will do this:  He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.  Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him;"  Psalm 37:5-7~

"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."  Philippians 4:13~

Honesty

 

The day started off badly when A wet the bed for the third time this week.  I had no patience.  I hate it when I am that way.   A had gone two months without wetting the bed and I voiced that aloud last week.  And then like a "Oh Yeah...!"  she wets it three times... and last night there was no water proof mattress pad on her bed (from the accident the night before) and so it was all over the nova foam topper and the mattress.  I just wanted to lay in the floor of the hallway and cry... loudly.  M has been potty trained for a year and out of the blue he will have these spells where he just pees in his pants like he knows nothing different.  He peed his pants twice yesterday.  I just want to lay in the floor and cry... loudly.  I can't even keep laundry done much less keep all the pee washed away.

A was mad I woke her up.  She is nine, you know, and doesn't need me anymore.  And it was besides the fact that at 5 a.m. when we were I was cleaning up pee that she was playing around with her alarm clock and turned it off.  It doesn't matter that she was supposed to be up 15 minutes before I went in to wake her up and that she would not have woken up on her own.  And she also didn't want what I made her for breakfast... since she often first looks to see what has been made for breakfast and then starts declaring in a fabulously whinning voice that sounds close to nails being drug down a chalk board that she doesn't want whatever has been made.  This is followed with anger that she is being made to eat what has been made and then she starts declaring how she loves everyone else in the room except me.

It is on days like this I want to drive away.  I want to pack a bag and some books and get in my car and find a little room in a b&b with a white puffy goose down comforter, lots of soft floral pillows, a window overlooking a grove a wonderful old trees, a cd player, and a lock on the door.  I want to walk into that room and be alone.  No one screaming my name at 5 a.m.  No pee to clean up.  No one looking to see what they can get me to do for them.  No laundry.  No meals to prepare and clean up after.  No floors to sweep and mop for the millionth time.  No toys to pick up.  No errands to run.  No fights to break up.  No back talk to listen to, try to discipline, and then shake off.  No words to deflect from my heart.  No moments of flesh to fight when I am pushed to the wall for the 20th time that day. 

But I can't.

And so I cling to the words above and beg for the presence of the one who spoke them... and keep walking forward.

When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars,

which you have set into place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the

son of man that you care for him?  You made him a little lower than

the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.  Psalm 8:3-5~

Compelled... 2 Corinthians 5:14

"For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.  And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.  So from now on we regard no one from a worldy point of view.  Though we once regarded Christ this way, we do so no longer.  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!  All this is from God who reconciled us to Himself  through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us."  2 Corninthians 5:14-20

There is this yearning inside me to live more and more for Jesus and less and less for myself.  What does this look like in my marriage?  What does this look like in my parenting?  What does this look like in our family?  What does this look like in my daily choices and the way I spend my time?

As God continues to so sweetly reveal His love to me through Jesus over and over and over... I am compelled to change more and more.  What does this look like in my interaction and responses to people around me?  What does this look like in my family?  What does this look like in my marriage?  What does this look like in my daily choices?

As God reveals Himself to me, I see more in me that I want changed?  How do I lay it all down?  How do I surrender enough to allow God to make the changes?  How do I handle it when I fall into sin again? 

As God reveals Himself and His word to me, I want more and more and more of Him.  How do I find time and ways to stay saturated with Him and balance daily life?  What does this look like in my home?  What does this look like every day?

I want everything I do and say to be compelled by Christ's love.  And it is not.  It is often compelled by exhaustion, frustration, disappointment, fear and anger.  I HATE that.

God is stirring in me again.  I love it when He does this.  I know He is there and I know He is working... and I have to wait.  Oh how I do not want to get anxious and mess anything up.  So I wait.  Oh how I want it to be all from Him and none from me.  So I wait.

God stirred my heart for Vladamirs.  I had several reasons why we should not host again this summer?  I had a list. 
1.) I want to just "be" this summer.  We have hosted and adopted like crazy the past couple years.  Are you living your life for you or are you living your life for me?
2.) We really don't have the space.  Really?  How much space do you need for one of my children?
3.)  I am going to Africa.  Yes, you are.  And why does that get in the way of giving another child a chance to know my love and to see me be His God?
4.) I don't want to get hurt?  I don't want to hurt him.  I don't want to bring him here and not have a family step up to adopt him.  I don't want to send him back without that hope. I can't.   "I, I, I."  I heard a lot of "I".  Where am "I... the Alpha and Omega" in your "I"?  Hear me, obey me and trust me.  I am God and I am in control.
5.) I don't want to mess with paperwork again.  You are going to let a child's life be determined by some papers?  I know you better than that.
6.) I can't take on another child... there is not enough of me.  But there is enough of me, and I am in you, and I am all you need.  Rely on me... it's all from me.

Then I went to the I AM FREE conference last week in Atlanta.  It was a Children's Hope Chest (http://www.hopechest.org/) event and Tom Davis, the founder, said something that I can't let go; "We live like we are on vacation when we should be living like we are at war... because we are at war."  Those words echo in my heart over and over and over... "We live like we are on vacation..."  How does that apply to me.  "We should be living like we are at war..." What does that look like?

Then the Lord told me two things.  "You are a voice.  There is always one more."

And so in obedience I accepted the call He placed on my heart.  It was on Don's heart too.  God used my husband to confirm His call and whispers to me.  Oh how I love that!

So I am praying and waiting in anticipation to see what God is going to do.  For I know it will be good.
And I wait as He stirs change in me.  And I wait.  For I know it will be good.

There is a child...

There is a child.

There is a child who once had a family.

That family is no more.

There is a child who holds loss close to his heart.

That heart is full of pain and longing.

There is a child who tried to survive.

Surviving was harder than we can imagine.

There is a child who entered an orphanage.

That orphanage is not a home.

There is a child who is sweet and tender.

That sweetness and tenderness helps others.

There is a child whose eyes spoke to my heart.

That heart can't ignore the whispering of the Holy Spirit.

There is a child whom God placed boldly on my heart at 4 a.m. this morning.

At 4 a.m. he was close to having lunch.

There is a child who will board a plane in July and make a long journey to a place unknown.

That place unknown will be our home.

There is a child who will be greeted by strangers.

Those strangers will be us.

There is a child who needs a forever family.

Is that forever family you?

There is a child.

His name is Vladamirs.

Don and I decided at 4 a.m. this morning that God was calling us to bring Vladamirs to our home for the summer hosting program with Project 143.  We are so excited to be the hands and feet of God and to bring him here in hopes to shower him with God's love and to find a forever family.  He will be with us for a month.

I will share more on how this came about later.

Your prayers are so appreciated... as always!!

Here are some specific requests (you know I love to share specifics!).

1.) God to protect his heart.

2.) God to prepare him for this journey.

3.) For nothing to come in the way of him coming.

4.) For Don to be off when he arrives.

5.) For safe travels.

6.) For the Lord to open the heart of his forever family and for them to meet him while he is with us.  For God to move mightily and open and close doors.  For God to be glorified in this hosting and in all the host families of this program.

7.) For him to see God's hand on his life... all of it.

8.)  And for us.  He will arrive while I am in Africa.  I HATE I won't be here when he comes but how cool will it be that I will be with the precious children and people in Uganda.  I'll only miss a few days. :0)  Pray for energy, health, guidance, wisdom and patience.

9.) Pray for our children... that their hearts will take in what we are doing, that their hearts will be protected, that God will use them to bless him and he them.

10.) Pray for the many children who have not been hosted yet and that families come in during the last hour to give these children a chance.

11.) Pray for the hosting program... for the people there to be blessed and encouraged.  And for paperwork to be covered with the hand of God.

12.) Denounce attacks of the enemy off this program and these children's lives!

THANK YOU SO SO SO SO much!!!!!

With much love...

A glimpse of what's to come!

Back yards adventures and Mother's Day at the lake!

Tired... but hungry

I am tired today.  I was tired yesterday.  I am feeling very unmotivated.  I usually equate this with being spent.  I am overcome with all kinds of things I want to get done.  Practical things like laundry, floors, organizing some drawers, cleaning bathrooms, and sweeping out the garage.  And then fun things like painting furniture, making pins, purses, and pillows, downloading and editing photos... maybe even a scrapbook page!  And then there are phone calls to the doctor to see if he will cover some shots I need for my Africa trip, the second call to the hospital to schedule therapy evaluations for Abby, and to the vet to schedule the fluffy one for some maintenance.  But I kinda walk around in circles and really get nothing done.

I am reminded that even Jesus got tired and went away from the people are various times.  And then I don't feel so bad.

Last night, before I went to bed, I was reading through Acts in the Bible and again and again and again I was struck with "the name of Jesus" all over the place.  It just kept yelling at me!

Acts 3:6 "Then Peter said, "Silver and gold I do not have but what I have I give you.  In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk."  And he did.

Acts 3:16 "By faith in the name of Jesus, this man whom you see and know has been made strong.  It is Jesus' name and faith that comes through him that has given this complete healing to him, as you can all see."

Acts 4:7 "They had Peter and John brought before them (rulers in Jerusalem) and began to question them: "By what power or what name did you do this?"

Acts 4:10  "then know this, you and all the people of Israel:  It is by the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom you crucified but whom God raised from the dead, that this man stands before you healed."

Acts 4:17,18 "But to stop this from spreading any further among the people, we must warn these men to speak no longer in this name.  Then they called them in again and commanded them not to speak or teach at all in the name of Jesus."

Acts 8:12  "But when they believed Philip as he preached the good news of the kingdom of God and the name of Jesus Christ, they were baptized, both men and women."

Acts 9: 15 "But the Lord said to Ananias, "Go!  This man (Saul) is my chosen instrument to carry my name before the Gentiles and their kings and before the people of Israel.  I will show him how much he must suffer for my name."

Acts 9:27,28  "... had preached fearlessly in the name of Jesus... speaking boldly in the name of the Lord."

Acts 10:43  "All prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name."

Acts 10:48  "So he ordered that they be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ."

Acts 19:1-:4  " While Apollos was at Corinth, Paul took the road through the interior and arrived at Ephesus.  There he found some disciples and asked them, "Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?"  They answered, "No, we have not even heard that there is a Holy Spirit."  So Paul asked, "Then what baptism did you recieve?"  "John's baptism," they replied.  Paul said, "John's baptism was a baptism of repentance.  He told the people to believe in the one coming after him, that is Jesus.  On hearing this, they were baptized into the name of the Lord Jesus.  When Paul placed hands on them, the Holy Spirit came upon them, and they spoke in tongues and prophesied."

Acts 19:17  "... and the name of the Lord Jesus was held in high honor." 

I stopped at Chapter 21.  I was tired... remember?  :0)  So as I went to bed last night, I pondered all this I read... and some more... and asked God to reveal the name of Jesus to me.  The power in that name.  The access in that name.  The authority in that name.  The presence of that name.  The salvation in that name.  What these scriptures are really saying.  I think there is something here that many of us miss...that we aren't taught.  I think it is something huge.  And I am longing to be immersed in it. 

P.S.  I did have a crazy dream about making water rise up to me!  Hillarious but fun!

Yeah... It's Friday!

This picture cracks me up!  Who knew riding your tricycle could be so dangerous!  Yet, Marc wants his helmet on and ends up walking away from this every time!  It totally makes me laugh so hard to look out and see this tricycle in the yard in this position!  It's how my life feels sometimes!! :0)

Today, both girls are having a friend come home with them from school.  Big day for us.  Abby has been asking about it at least 100 times a day since Monday.  Her poor teacher.  I don't know how the girls will make it through the day today!

This week has been busy but I don't seem to know exactly what I got done!  It was teacher appreciation week and I wanted to share a couple gifts we made/got the teachers that are VERY low cost to free!  I know the week is over but there is also the last day of school coming up as well as little love gifts that can always be given to most anyone!

These little jars of flowers turned out too cute!  They are from artichoke hearts I buy often to use in pasta.  I simply wrapped a little scrap of scrapbooking paper around it, taped it together with a double sided sticky, and added a sticker!  I then went outside and gathered the flowers and rosemary.  So this little gift was free!  I also love to wrap tin cans in paper and do this same thing... I love the metal with the blooms!  The girls took these with cards they made and the teachers loved them.

Another gift started from this... a box of soaps from T.J.Maxx!  There were four inside for just $5.99.

The soaps themselves were so pretty.  One side had this lavender on it and there was engraved writing on the other side.  I could have just kicked myself for not having a lavender plant!  A sprig of lavender with a ribbon would have been oh so perfect... but I made do with that I had.  These bags are bags I have used in the past for jewelry and fabric pins on cards made from scrap paper.  I LOVE them.  You can find them at climax.com in MANY sizes.  They are made for photos.

Then I went and got some of these cute ready made tags that are in one of my many scrapbook paper pads.  They come in very handy.  I used them in a pretty cute way to 'wrap" one of my mom's Mother's Day presents but I'll have to show you that later... after she gets her box!

I put a hole punch in the tag, tied on the ribbon and there you go!

They were not only pretty... but they smelled great too!  And they were $1.50 each when all was said and done!

And of course... I gave away some of my sweet little fabric pins!  But you already know about those!

* While I was writing this post, Abby's teacher called to say her friend, "B" was going home with a 101 degree fever.  Can you believe it?  I am so heart broken for Abby.  And to make it worse... Taylor will now have someone over and she won't.  I could just cry.  I'll have to turn into "play mom" and be her friend when she gets home today.  So sad.

Have a fabulous weekend... and to all my mother friends... Happy Mother's Day Girls!

And to my mother... I love you crazy!

A Girl And Her Bike

This is actually her third "go around"... starting off with daddy.

She dressed herself... just wanted you to know that!  The black belt was the perfect accessory!

Love it!  :0)

And there she went... around the yard... in the grass... like she has never struggled!

Sorry the pictures are "hot!"  It was in the blazing middle of the day and this kind of sun is horrid for pictures.  I couldn't even calm it down in editing... but you can see her anyway!

And here is my girl, with her sweet, calm, inwardly glad and proud little smile!

Can't you just see it in her eyes!  Wings... her spirit has wings!

We were taking a water break... after many circles.

After a few more days in the yard (makes for a slower pace), we'll hit the track that's close by.

We went out tonight, before bed, in her nightgown, and did a few circles.  She's still got it!

As for other news... guess what arrived today...?

Check it out... fabulous zoisia (sp?) grass for our back yard we are giving some major love to right now!

Isn't it amazing?  The driver told me it had been cut just three hours before... and here it is.

You know what is not amazing!?  When the lawn people came to spray and kill the old weeds grass that was in the back... they also killed my GARDEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It was growing like crazy!  And even after asking them to be MINDFUL of it twice and be sure NOT to get spray on it... bozo lawn man just gave it leprosy and now I have to pull it up and start over!  I am just furious sick to my stomach.  Those plants are like my babies!  One plant was at the end of one box and survived the murder spray... my grape tomato plant is FINE and already has blooms and a couple tomatoes on her!!!!!!!

Here is another horrid less than lovely picture of the backyard from my bathroom window.  It's dead.  So sad.  But when I saw it, it made me realize how death has to come before true life can happen.

I'll show you "after" shots soon.  The lawn goes down tomorrow!

Good Night!

Yesterday's Gift

My sweet Abby, 

 You were given the sweetest gift yesterday... you took off on your bicycle...

without training wheels... and you received your wings.

You have tried to learn for oh so long... and yesterday was your day.

As I held onto the seat... something whispered to me... "Let go."

And I did.

As I watched you ride away, as if I had never held on, the joy rose up from the tips of my toes.

My hands covered my mouth and I held my breath... I didn't want to make a peep.

I had no idea if you knew I was no longer there.

And you rode in a half circle... around the tree... far from me.

And then you stopped... and looked for me.

You were there... and I was here.

Shouts of joy bounced off the clouds as mommy jumped up and down!

YOU DID IT ABBY GRACE!!!  YOU DID IT!  YOU RODE YOUR BIKE...

ALL BY YOURSELF.

Your smile was pure and so full of joy.

My tears were falling and my spirit was soaring.

You did it Abby Grace.  You did it.

You never gave up.  You tried again and again and again...

and your spirit has found a new way to fly...

and our hearts have found a new song.

I am so happy for you...

I love you...

Mommy

I will post pictures of her first day of riding tomorrow!

(The source of the sweet picture in this post can be found on etsy.com)