One Beautiful Life

My Grandmother

1928-2008

My grandmother died last week. She was 79 years old. She'd been not doing well at all for several months, so her death was some what expected. But death is death and it is so final. To bury her youngest daughter just a few weeks ago and now her, death seems more real and final to me than ever before.

The finality of death, of course is just for our body and our life here on earth. However, it is not final at all in the fact that our soul lives on. I should say that the seperation of soul and body is more real to me... and it has impressed on me, even more, the importance of decisions we make in the brief moments of this life we are given.

As I look at this picture of my grandmother at 9 years of age, I see a young girl with a life time ahead of her. Many moments lie ahead to make decisions that will affect the life of herself, her friends, her children and her grandchildren. Decisions that will have affects for generations. Looking at this picture, she doesn't appear to know the magnitude of those choices... what 9 year old does?

The only way to make choices that are good choices is to do it in the presence and with the guidance of a God who has promised to guide us well. Even then we mess up... but God can and does bring beauty from ashes.

My grandmother had a heart that held on to her childhood with clinched fists. Her heart held on to the dreams and to the pain that came from and forever remained there. As an adult, she often talked of her childhood and her room looked like a child's, full of pictures from her childhood, dolls, teddy bears, and small trinkets. When she talked to me about these items, I could see on her face and in her voice that they carried memories of pain... and it broke my heart.

This pain followed her and tormented her. It caused her to lash out at people she loved. It sorrows me to my core to see how pain can cause people such torment. This same pain carries on throughout this family... through many, many family members. The healing hand of God awaits... waits opened and ready. His healing hand is the only source of healing and I pray that this family can embrace the God of the universe who offers such refuge and freedom.

My grandmother's favorite color was blue. Her favorite flowers were tulips and pansies. Her favorite movie as a young girl was "Golden Earrings". She loved my grandfather with her whole heart as he loved her. She had four girls and raised one of her grandsons as her own son. She walked through this life the best way she knew how and she loved the best way she could... and now she is gone.