Good days and bad days.
Yesterday was a bad day. Bad day for me. Don had been gone on a trip and I was fried. I am trying to inventory my business to pass it along this Friday. That means I am counting beads, and spacers and earring wires, and charms and pendants, measuring silver chain and leather and silver wire, counting supplies like tools and display pieces and boxes... fried... did I mention fried?
So in addition to this, which I am blessed is short lived, I am schooling Abby and growing more stressed with Abby's seizure increase as each day goes by... watching her eyes slip further away into deep dreariness and watching her lose words in her head and act out in negative behaviors in loud protest to drugs exhausts my soul with frustration and sadness. I battle with the balance. It is my greatest battle. Being sleep deprived into the core of my being is yet another great battle that makes my cheerie and patient disposition slip further away into a place that is deep and hard to reach.
So yesterday I lost my patience and raised my voice and was really ready to slip away for a weeks rest. Then Don came home last night and I rertreated to Abby's unused room to sleep. I actually did sleep and was surprised when I awoke the first time to morning light. Today is a better day. Even though Abby had a seizure this morning, school went well, her lunch is being eatten and her nap about to begin. I will retreat to the studio to count some more and then we will be delighted with our afternoon fire and family time, making dinner together and then lying down again.
It is a better day. And I am thankful for that.
I am so sorry everything is starting to take a toll on you. Poor Abby having so many seizures and dealing with the side effects of the meds. My prayers go out to her, you and your husband.
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