For Sale

It's been a long time coming... kinda.

I have been playing with it for a while...

and opportunities keep presenting themselves...

and more and more people are telling me to do it...

and more and more people are trying to hire me to do it...

and it is super fun...

and so I am going to start selling my photography!

Details are coming soon!

Transparent

I received a precious and encouraging email today about my blog this morning... about my post from last Thursday... getting smacked by God!  I am so thankful God sends His love to me through His children.  It is a very sweet way He loves us with skin on. (Thank you sweet friend.)

I have never met the person that sent it to me.  She knows my family through Abby's illness.  Another way He brings beauty from ashes.  She thanked me for being transparent.  She had looked it up and here is the meaning: transparent - having the property of transmitting rays of light through its substance so that bodies situated beyond or behind can be distinctly seen.   I love that!

Anything good you see on this blog is HIM being distinctly seen!  HE is the substance situated beyond me (inside me) that I so want to be seen shinning through me!  All I can say is "Mission Accomplished". I am sold out for God. My life has forever been altered by His amazing presence and I will shout it from the roof tops to give Him glory and encourage others to seek Him with their WHOLE heart. There is NOTHING better.  It's intoxicating!

God has sent people to me through this blog that see Him here.  Several of them are people I have never met.  God has given me a passion, an outlet, and a voice.  And I will use it.  I was really convicted last week on "fear of man".  Why do I fear what man thinks of me when I live for God?  I can no longer be bound by that.  God said, "Stop."  I will continue to share testimony of what He continues to do in my life as I am to be a living testimony!  Then He will use the seeds scattered to do His will!  I am just a tool... a vessel... and the more He pours into me... the more I am called to share and pour it out onto others!  I am to be overflowing!  AND I AM!!!!!!!!

I love you all so very much.  Thank you for your friendship.  Thank you for your love.  Be BLESSED this weekend!!!!!!!!  And LOOK FOR HIM!
 

Sweet Summer Shoes

A couple weeks ago, we did the cutest "craft".  We started with these $3 tennis shoes from Wal-Mart.  Then we added some Sharpie marker action with some imagination and came out with the cutest shoes!

These are Abby's.  I had so much fun helping the girls, I went to Wal-Mart and got myself a pair and made some too!  When we wear them, we get TONS of compliments.  And what a great idea for a birthday party or sleep over!   Get busy! :0)

Yesterday, she embraced NINE

I can't believe my Abby is NINE years old.   Where do I begin to even try and describe the joy I have in being given the gift and blessing to love her for another year and see her grow?  We recently watched home videos of her.  Seeing her learning to walk again at four, before she could talk again, brought forth so much emotion from deep within me.  The thankfulness I feel for how much God has given her is so full and so deep, there simply is not a word big enough to describe it.

She is strength and beauty in ways I can't fully express.  She is a miracle.  And that miracle continues to grow and bloom before our eyes. 

Her laughter fills me with pure joy.  Her pain and frustration fills me with sadness.  Her life fills me with hope.  Her past fills me with faith.  Her smile fills me with love.  She has so much of my heart.

Her birthday celebration filled the weekend!  She looks at birthday cakes all year and so it has become a tradition, as of late, that she gets to pick out a cake on her birthday.  It thrills her and makes it pretty easy for me... so it's a win win!

She also picked out a big "9" candle this year... she thought it was too cool!

It made blowing out the candles this year super easy too!

Friday, grandaddy came to town and we went to the Braves game.  Abby wore her birthday crown from Grammy.  Many people told her "Happy Birthday" and she thought that was fun.  One vendor even sent a gift up to her at our seats, a tomahawk.  It was very sweet and a special little gift from God, for sure, for my little warrior!  She felt special. 

It was a fun night, even though the Braves lost... and it was pretty hot.

Marc enjoyed the tomahawk!  We enjoyed it all! 

Have a great Monday!

Truth, Knowledge, and Freedom

Wow, this is my 700th post.  That amazes me.  I love going back and looking at my earlier posts.  I can forget so much.  Abby was so small.  The future was and remains so unknown.

I love to go back and see God's hand all over my life.  Almost two years ago, I was crying out to God over adoption.  Hawks are a way He shows Himself to me.  OFTEN, I am in nature and I ask to see Him and He gives me a hawk... in the most random of places.  I can now look back to the day at the lake where as I cried out to him about adoption woes, He sent a hawk crying out over my head.  As I cried at how precious He was to not only show me... but answer my cry with a cry... the second hawk flew over my head and landed right by me in a tree... and there were two hawks... crying out to each other... over and over.

And here I am today, with His promise right here in my home, not one more, but two more children.

I love to post sweet pictures of my children.  I love to post fun decorating ideas.  I love to post funny stories from our very busy and funny life.  But I hesitate to share amazing things that God is doing... for fear it may be too much, too deep, too... out there.  And that saddens me to my core.  I will no longer shy away from that anymore.  I can't.  God is too active and all over my life right now not to share it.  I am almost embarrassed to not share it.

So this post is a very personal and amazing account of what happened to me Tuesday night at a worship I attend at someone's house.  Believers from many area churches come here, for more.  I crave being there... with them... and in Him.

I had fasted Tuesday and wasn't even sure why.  Most of the time when I fast, I have a clear reason for doing so and pray often about it that day.  Tuesday I felt I was to fast but had no clear reason.  I did it any way and simply told the Lord, I know you are going to show up and I can't wait to see what it is you have for me tonight.

The lesson that night was on iniquity.  I learned that iniquity, sin, and transgression are actually three seperate offenses... three seperate degrees or levels if you will.  Sin and transgression stem from iniquity in your life.  
Iniquity is the roots and the latter two are the leaves of the tree.  The definition of sin is missing the mark, failure.  Transgression is rebellion.  Iniquity is twisted, crooked, warped, evil thoughts in humans that transmit spiritual DNA down through generations... it is the core cause/feeder of sin and transgression.  The visual given was that of a black twisted cord full of knots that runs through our spiritual life.

Psalm 51 is written by David.  David was called a friend of God.  However, David was human.  And David sinned.  He looked upon another man's wife, committed adultry with her, got her pregnant, and killed her husband to try and hide his sin.  Wow.  That's some big stuff.  As he writes this pslam, crying out to God, he asks: "Have mercy on me, O God, according to your lovingkindness; according to the multitude of your tender mercies, Blot out my transgressions, wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.  For I acknowledge my transgressions, and my sin is always before me."  Psalm 51: 1-3

To see David call out three seperate offenses just blew me away.  How many times have I just read right over that?  I love it when God reveals more in His word to me... it excites me so much.  We studied more scripture and then entered into a time of praise and worship and the Lord brought one word up to me.  Its one word that sums up so much of my sin.  It was my iniquity.  I have prayed about it so many times... even did a Christian self-help study on it... nothing had taken it from me.  It has been the thorn in my flesh.

Anger.

I started sobbing.  Anger is at the root of my defensiveness.  Anger is at the root of my lashing out.  Anger is at the root of my judging.  Anger is at the root of my not trusting.  Anger had entangled itself all inside me.  I always knew it was there and spent much effort in trying to control it... cover it... ignore it... figure it out... be free from it.  Anger and trying to keep it down exhausted me.

I knew I was supposed to go forward and pray to be released from this iniquity.  I had asked to be prayed over about it the last time I was there.  And yet, had felt nothing change.  I went up to the woman who prayed for me before.  I told her that God has shown me that anger was one of my iniquities.  I told her that I had prayed about it many times and had people pray over me about it... and yet it remained.  I told her I didn't know where it stemmed from... when it had taken hold of me... but I wanted to be free from it.

She held me... waited... and then asked me, "Who in your family is anger?"  And it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I saw her face.  I started sobbing again as I told her who this person was.  Then I told her how this person was angry when my parent's divorced.  How she blamed my mother.  How she despised me because I "looked and acted like my mother" and had actually spat in my face in the midst of her fury.  This person had caused me so so much pain.  It was overwhelming.  She asked me to repent for this person's anger.  With just the suggestion, I could feel compassion and pain and forgiveness rising up in me at once.  Through my sobbing and tears, I begged the Lord to forgive the anger of this person.  She then asked me to repent of the anger that had been cursed and thrown upon me and that I had received.  As I repented, I felt so much pain and darkness leave me that I wanted to fall into a tiny heap on the floor. 

She then prayed over me for things that were so personal.  She asked for me to be freed of the guilt and rejection I feel of looking like my mother.  I sobbed from deep within.  How did she know that?  As a child, and now, I think my mother is beautiful.  Yet when someone tells me that I look like her or act like her... it has felt like sand paper rubbing me.  I have not fully understood this until then.  I could see the face of this person spewing to me that I looked like my mother in disgust and it vanished from me.  I was free.  I am now free to look like my mother and be strong and funny and creative and loving like she is and fully embrace it.
She then asked for the feeling of a trapped child to leave me along with the transgression of rebellion.  I was blown away.  Trapped sums up the entire feeling of my childhood.  And she named it.  And she casted it from me in Jesus' Holy name and authority, and it left.  I no longer feel trapped.  It's hard to explain.  But that feeling followed me into my marriage and is smeared over various parts of my life.  And it's gone.  

She prayed for this person's anger with God over what had happened in my family.  Then she asked me to repent of my anger towards God.  And I did.  She prayed God's truths over me and prayed for God's love and light and compassion to fill the spaces.  Then she prayed for God to nurture me, as I was not nurtured as a child.

I am so blown away by God's mighty hand, His mighty power, how alive He and His Spirit are, and how He shows Himself to me more and more and more and draws me closer and closer and closer into Him.  His love for me, to care for me so much, to want me to know this and grow in Him and be blessed by Him in such transforming manner, just blows me away... over and over and over again. 

I have true hunger and thirst for Him like I have never known in my life.  I want to be with Him all the time.  I can't concentrate on much else.  I am forever being changed.  His Spirit is blowing me away.  I can't get enough.

I am not sure why God led me to post this.  I do know it is for His glory.  Someone who reads this will be moved by Him.  And for that, I do it.  And because He is so much more than many of us have known Him to be... Oh I pray that one person is moved to truly KNOW Him!

I love you so much.  Have a blessed weekend.  

Holy is the Lord

"The four living creatures, each having six wings, were full of eyes around and within.  And they do not rest day or night, saying:  Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, Who was and is and is to come!
Whenever the living creatures give glory and honor and thanks to Him who sits on the throne, who lives forever and ever, the twenty-four elders fall down before Him who sits on the throne and worship Him who lives forever and ever, and cast their crowns before the throne, saying: You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; For you created all things, and by Your will they exist and were created."  Revelation 4: 8-11~


We sang this song today at church.  "How great is our God."  I can not sit when we sing this song.  I was overcome today, as I worshipped my God, my loving Father in heaven and sang the words, "How great is our God," to Him.  The words are so passionate and full of truth.  I am filled with awe at the words, "He wraps Himself in light, and darkness tries to hide, and trembles at His voice... and trembles at His voice..."  I want to rise off my feet as I speak the words of this song to my God.

I am amazed at His presence in my life.  I am amazed to see His hand unfolding His plan in my life.  I am overcome with wanting as He pulls me closer to Him.  I am full of joy and excitement as I talk about Him with Brenda... and we are talking a lot about Him lately.  Just yesterday morning, we floated in the calm and cool waters of the lake and talked about Him for almost an hour.  And God was there.

I had been floating on my back in the water with my fingers in my ears... so I could not hear anything except my breathing.  I had on sunglasses and I was watching the clouds change above my head in the brilliant blue sky.  I felt His presence and I longed to see Him.  I am longing to see Him more and more and more.  So I started praying..."Lord, I know you are here... and I want to see you... show my your face... show me your light... show me your presence."  I prayed this over and over and over, mixed with praise and thanksgiving for the beauty of his creation, as I watched the sky.  And slowly, a very dark cloud came and covered the cloud I was watching... and then brilliant streams of light, from the sun behind the first cloud, shot out around the edges of the dark cloud and I started laughing with pure delight.  I knew He would show Himself to me and I was like a child swimming in pure happiness. 

I heard water stirring loudly and realized that someone was swimming towards me... I was sad at first... my quiet time was over... but my heart was full of Him.  I lifted my head to see Brenda coming and immediately she asked, "What are you doing?"  So I told her, "I am talking to God."  "How can you talk to God and hear Him?" (I had mentioned to her earlier that God speaks to us in many ways)  So I told her what had just happened and she thought it was "cool". :0)  This led to more God talk... about salvation and baptism and the Christian walk and spiritual growth.  I love talking to her about God.  He has amazing plans for her and I am so priviledged to be a tool for the Lord in her coming to Him!

The "coolness of God" continued that evening.  We had friends arrive at our house just 15 minutes after we arrived home to stay with us for the weekend.  So we went to dinner at a restaurant we go to often.  We were sitting outside waiting on our meal, and Abby needed to go to the bathroom.  We know the owner of this restaurant and pretty much most of the staff.  Abby has been here a bagillion times and she has walked herself to the bathroom a bagillion times.  So I let her go.

She had been gone about three minutes and I was in the middle of conversation when, "Check on Abby" flooded my soul.  This was the Holy Spirit.  I STARTED to talk myself out of it... and then I leaned over and asked Brenda to go and make sure Abby was in the women's restroom and that she was ok.  Brenda asked, "Doesn't she know where to go?" and I replied, "I need to know she is safe."  Brenda came back moments later with Abby and said, "She was in the men's bathroom."  My heart jumped.  I looked at Abby with confusion and anger and slight panic.  "Was there a man in that bathroom?" I asked.  "No, Mommy," she replied.  I then proceeded with the "Why did you do that?" and from my face she could see there was real concern.  "I didn't see the dress," she answered.  She has been taught that the dress on the door means it is for girls.

Abby has been to the women's bathroom there a bagillion times.  She isn't able to tell me why she went into a room she has never been in before... and that did not have a dress on the door.  But I can tell you why.  As we stood outside and waited for the men to pay for dinner inside, I told Brenda that God had spoken to me at dinner and told her the above story.  She smiled from ear to ear and said how wonderful God was to protect Abby and speak to me to help her.  God also allowed the room to remain empty while Abby was in there and protected her.  God gave Brenda an amazing example of how He speaks to us on the very day we had been talking about it... He watered the seed that was planted that very morning.  And He also filled me with more delight and thanksgiving in Him.

So this morning, as I sang these words to the Lord, tears streamed down my face and the wind of the Holy Spirit blew upon me.  I remain in awe of Him, remain hungry for Him, and can't wait to see Him again!  Oh, how I love Him!

Independence Day Celebrating

Small town style parade, flying candy, 80 degree weather, friends, salmon burgers, hard lemonade, naps, pic nic, fireworks... family and fun.

BRAVES GAME

A week or so ago, we went to an Atlanta Braves game and we had SO MUCH FUN!

Brenda was amazed and very excited that she was not bored!  It was funny.  Here are a few pictures from that night of fun that was topped off with fireworks!

 

Marc's first taste of cotton candy... major hit!

Cotton Candy Girls!

My... how the garden grows

This is one of the two garden boxes Don made for me.  Isn't it beautiful?  And my garden loves it.  It is going bonkers!  The squash is out of control (overflowing plants on the left).  It is now double the size in the picture, spilling down over the backside and one section broke off (tears) from the weight of it hanging over. 

This box contains cantelope, three tomato plants, jalapino pepper, green bell pepper, yellow bell pepper, crazy squash, and marigolds to keep out critters.  They are doing their job well.

My second box is also MUCH fuller than this now!  It contains cucumber (growing like crazy now too), herbs (rosemary, cilantro, basil), a cherry tomato plant and green beans. I also have oregano and lemon thyme in another free standing pot.  I actually had to move some things around last week.  The cilantro and basil had to moved to another pot and two pepper plants had to be moved to this box since my squash is gigantoid.  I also lost four green bean plants to ants (little stinkers I attacked with baby powder) and so I had some extra room.

It is great fun having a garden.  And there is just something way too cool about going out and picking squash, green beans, and tomatoes and then bringing it into the kitchen, cooking it and eatting it!  And it just bursts with flavor.  I have been having flashbacks in my mouth from childhood when we lived on a farm.  The cucumbers just blow me away... with how much flavor they have, how crisp and clean they taste.  The kids love it too.  I am hooked and already wanting Don to make at least one more box for next year's garden.

 

I am totally intrigued with the squash plant and the whole growth process.  The leaves are huge, soaking in the sun and creating a canopy that provides shade for the yellow blooms beneath that turn into squash.

The stalks are hollow, leaving them fragile (very fragile) and so therefore they are covered in tiny razor sharp thorn-like thingies to protect them.  Brilliant.  No rabbit is going to chomp on one of these bad boys!  And they are FULL of water... amazing.

 

Watching blooms turn into green beans, tomatoes, squash, pepper and cucumbers has made me feel like a child again... just caught up in the wonder of it all.  It's totally cool!  God is totally cool.  I have lettuces and brussel sprouts to plant this fall... don't know where yet!